Swearing?
First, by "swearing" I mean all forms of the words in the English language which are commonly seen as bad words, dirty words or cusswords, not including blasphemy. Avoiding blasphemy for religious reasons is different (but the attitude you take about it is important). I don't have a problem with people who avoid blasphemy.A couple of things have prompted this. The first was getting berated by someone I barely know for swearing at all. He was very uppity and judgemental about it. "I think it's crass and uncouth. I don't USE those words. I like to use other words. I mean, what's the point of using those words? They're just offensive." If he hadn't made a big point of acting like he was superior for avoiding a colorful segment of the English vocabulary, I doubt I'd have reacted this way. However, he was SUCH a pompous ass about it so now he has to pay the price of my ranting in public about it. . . HI HA!
The second was something an ex-manager said, in regard to a coworker who had used this language in a company-wide letter. His attitude was, "I don't see the point of using such language. I mean, what does it achieve? Nothing." He went on and on, exclaiming that the former coworker had accomplished nothing by being so offensive.
This statement is completely wrong. The use of that language did exactly what the author intended - it pissed people off, got them talking about the issues at hand, got people offended, and it totally burned his bridges so he could never work there again.
It actually accomplished quite a lot.
I'd like to know, what's the point of not using certain words? If we're never supposed to say these words, why do we have these words? Why would someone invent words we should never say?
We can probably all agree that there are certain language forms and vocabulary which are only appropriate for a given situation. I posit that swearing is extremely informal language, and is deemed appropriate only in extremely informal situations. Incidentally, I claim that people who don't think you should say such words, ever, tend to be elitists who think that swearing makes you "low class," or are just plain being self-righteous.
Clearly swearing is quite useful as anyone who has banged the bloody shit out of their finger with a hammer, or otherwise experienced an instance of great pain, has noticed.
Even some groups of people, like children, aren't supposed to swear. I'm not really sure why that is. I think it must be some ideas about maturity - children who swear are precocious misfits, I guess. Possibly it's that children are expected to speak more formally with adults around. Others believe that "ladies do not use foul/filthy language," as many of us women have been told. I think this bolsters my belief that it is the informality and familiarity of swearing that makes it unacceptable to some people and for some situations, since generally, women are also expected to be more formal than men.
Swearing isn't the only type of language that is inapproprate in certain circumstances. There are plenty of examples. For instance, the use of Black English (In-My-Not-So-Humble-Opinion a perfectly valid dialect of English), is unfortunately frowned upon in a formal office atmosphere. In an office environment we're pretty much expected to stick mostly to Standard English and well-established white slang, without much swearing or with no swearing. In my observation this is true, but on the other hand, I've never worked at a mostly minority business, either. Language expectations are additionally dependent on the type of business; jargon is different and the usage is different, depending on whether you're a lawyer, a physicist, a doctor, a programmer, or a middle manager. If you don't fall in line linguistically, you risk being labeled an outsider.
I certainly support people's own choice of language. However, the statements of the people who prompted this essay are examples of the all too common inability to believe that one has made the right choice unless one puts down those who make a different one. Swearing is very clearly an acceptable form of communication in certain circles. It does have purpose: venting frustrations, emphasis, communicating intense emotion, or showing that you are part of a group; it does accomplish something: emotional release, provocation, making an impression, communication of intense emotion, distancing yourself from a group or demonstrating your participation in a group.
Love, Squeedle